Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Recapitulation of recent revelry

Seeing as how I'm going out of town for the next week, I figured I would actually post so as to avoid the "bad blogger" syndrome. I can't say that I have much to talk about, but I'm sure I can come up with something.

Holy crap, I thought I had posted about my weekend. Guess not, maybe I do indeed have something to talk about.


I went to see my friend and her new baby. I didn't want to hold the baby. It was two days old, and I don't know if I've told you before, but I don't really enjoy holding children who cannot hold up their own head. I don't know why, but it's true. I had also been dealing with raw shrimp about 30 minutes before I went to go over to the house, and I don't care how much hand washing you do...raw shrimp hands are not something you should touch a newborn with. I was only there for about an hour before my friend got delirious after not having slept for 5 days, and I went home.

When I was there, I saw another of my old bowling teammates. Yeah, that's right, I used to bowl competitively. From ages 7-17, I was a competitive bowler. Eat that! Actually, when I was a Junior in high school, I played on a team with three other girls, all of which now have children and are/were married. I was the second bowler, and the cheerleader. Our team (the only all girl team) won the league that year. We kicked ass. I think my average was 187 that year. I could be found standing on the chairs at the bowling alley cheering for my teammates and trying to keep our third bowler (the new mom) from beating herself up too much when she didn't do well, and our anchor bowler (the divorcee - who was at new mom's house) from zoning out to the point where she would ignore what we were doing at the alley in order to pay attention to her flavor of the week.She's not the same person though - and she has an 8 month old.


Anyway, we made plans to go out the next night because her friend from Washington State was in town for the week and wanted to really experience going out in NY, and Divorcee JUST moved back to NYC a few weeks ago.

Around 10:30 I started to get ready. By get ready, I mean, I started drinking as I danced around and put my make up on. I spoke to B and we were going to go to Slate because her friend's friend was having a party there and why not. I also had the option of going to Sutra for my other friend's belated birthday celebration.

Divorcee and Washington State missed the 11:30pm ferry from Staten Island, and so they decided to drive to my house and then take the train with me into the city. I sat in my kitchen, still drinking, listening to the reggae channel, dancing, singing and waiting. We got ourselves together and took off to meet up with B and her friends.

As we crossed the bridge, B said that the cover for Slate was ridiculous, and they were only doing bottle service. Sutra had a $5...the decision had been made.

Sutra was PACKED. I have some pictures, but I haven't uploaded them yet, so you'll have to wait. I didn't blackout though. That's the really important part. Divorcee left super early because she just can't hang like she used to. WashState stayed with me and we shut down the club. She managed to get us a ride home, and it was amazing. As we were driving through Grand Army Plaza, we talked about standing up through the sunroof. She did it. I was in the back and pulled myself out of the window and sat on the edge - whilst the car was moving - and got AMAZING pictures of her. Very much like something you would see in a movie. It was a blast. Only downside was that there was a car full of guys that were driving next to us, and told WashState to show her boobs, which she wouldn't and when I said that, one of them yelled that I was too fat to be sitting on the window. Obviously not, homie. So biiiiite me!

Anyway, we got home. I left them sitting in the car and passed out. Apparently I made a long phone call to a 20 year old boy talking about dirty things in my sleep. So, maybe I didn't NOT blackout - but that's day 2 of keeping my blackouts to my house, which is a hell of an accomplishment.

I did NOTHING. When I say nothing, I mean nothing. B came over on Sunday night to commence packing. We did that for a few hours, and finally went to bed because packing is exhausting.

I went to work and the temp had started.

I can't say I like this woman. She is of the "older" variety, and not pleasant to look at/smell...Also, I'm incredibly bitter about what they're doing to my coworker and I just don't want this new lady here, which is why I'm really happy to be getting out of the office for the next 4 business days.

I spent a lot of time at work reading a book on my Kindle - thanks to Safari Cloud Reader. Winner!

I took care of some personal hygiene things after work in preparation for my trip. It cost me a fortune and wasn't really worth the inflated price, but it WAS convenient. When I got home, B was already at my house. We finished packing, went to get dinner and then she went to her friend's house. The whole time we were discussing this trip and the potential for a million types of disasters. We made a pact though, that if shit hits the fan, we are NOT involved...and let me tell you, this fan may be worse than the one that almost took off my finger in October.

I wanted to kill this man on the train because I've just about had it up to HERE with people who take one step onto a train and don't move in any further when there are clearly people trying to get on behind you. Why am I maneuvering around your selfish ass. Next time, I'm just shoving bitches.

There are a few things I have learned in the past few years since my surgery. By "things" i mean, "eating habits I should really cut out". I did not abide by these findings today.

1. Dairy vs. KG. I can do cheeses, but milk - never a good idea. Ice cream, especially when I've eaten before I have it - BIG mistake.

2. Fried foods = bad - don't handle those well thanks to my gallbladder-less-ness.

3. Drinking whilst eating - especially carbonated beverages (that I don't often drink anyway), big nono.

All three of these things will result in major discomfort and most likely, regurgitation.

Guess what I had for lunch? Fried soft shell crab, sushi, and green tea ice cream.

I guarantee is does not taste as delicious coming up as it does going down. My stomach is still being grumpy. In fact it is being very NOISY in protestation of my earlier behavior.

I hope that it gets it together, because I will be drinking today, and every day for the next 7 days.

Dear liver, 

Sorry in advance for partying. Happy Easter!


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