25

I'm 25 today.

I had an emotional crisis at the bar about this yesterday. I cried into my third cup of Absolut Mandarin and Fresh Squeezed Orange Juice. Then the Mexican brought out a birthday cake, and I bawled.

I haven't really celebrated a birthday since I was 13. I still have no plans to really celebrate tonight.

After vomiting all of the vodka and chocolate cake because orange juice and chocolate do not mix, especially on an empty stomach. I started to feel better. This guy and I compared scars. I'm pretty sure he one because he was in a humvee that got his by an IED, but my knee is pretty badass. He also brought me rice from his house. It was insanely perfect, and exactly what I wanted. The bartender, who I am buddies with, didn't let me pay for any of my drinks. It really was a great night.

We went to taco bell and then the MTA made me pay for that because the train started running in sections. I got home around 1:30am.

I went out this weekend too. Sadly, I don't feel like writing anymore.

Maybe I'll update about what it really feels like for me to be 25 tomorrow.

For now, happy birthday to me!

ASIDE: This is the email my dad wrote me that made me cry at the copy machine

Dear K,
 
It's hard to believe that 25 years have passed since mommy and I brought home our 

little bundle of joy.  You probably noticed while growing up that you had no 

siblings, like most other kids did. As our only genetic representative in the 

future of the universe, ensuring your well-being has been the single most powerful 

driving force of our lives.   Seeing the wonderful person that we have bestowed 

unto the earth, I think we did a pretty darn good job.   We're batting a thousand, 

one for one. I love that you're back in the house, and that I get to see you every 

day and be reminded just how fortunate I am. So Happy Birthday, and may all of 

your dreams forever come true.
 
Love,
Dad

Sometimes I think that Pandora feels guilty and repentant.

Every time I thumbs down a song, Pandora compensates by playing about 15 in a row that I've thumbs-ed up. I would pat Pandora on its little head and tell it that I'm not mad just stop playing shit you know I don't like, if it had a head. I like hearing new songs though, so just playing the ones with the thumbs up limits my music sometimes. I guess I just can't win.

That being said, I've been "winning" lately. My diet is going...well it's been ok. Last night was my division's holiday party so there was a bunch of free booze consumed and some buffet action, but I didn't eat beyond what I needed to make me full. Although the Mexican and I pretty much stalked the walking appetizers. One of the labs in the division totally camped out by the kitchen door to clear out the appetizer plates before they could make it out to the floor, but we were crafty and maneuvered out way in.

The best part about last night, however, was that everyone danced the night away. Some people got schwasted, and some people made fools of themselves, and everyone enjoyed themselves.

God I love my job environment sometimes.

When we were leaving the Mexican and I stopped at Mickey D's so he could get some nuggets. We got into some kind of fake screaming argument. It was pretty hilarious. We were both pretty drunk from downing a shit ton of vodka RIGHT before we left.

I sobered up enough to read on the train on the way home, and almost cried because Sarah's Key has been pushing me NEAR tears most times I read it. When I got home, I felt motivated. I worked out. That's right. I drunkenly did jumping jacks and other random crap from Jillian Michael's 30 day shred, all while attempting not to completely dehydrate or fall over.

I succeeded, but I guzzled an exorbitant amount of water and had to hold onto numerous pieces of furniture in my room whilst trying to stretch out my quads. Great success, and this guy who may be my future personal trainer was impressed by my dedication. (Little does he know, that was only day 3 of dedication, and the weekend is the real test).

Speaking of this guy. Let's give him a nickname. First, a backstory.

So when I was growing up, I spent a lot of time with my neighbor. Her nickname would be easy to give, if I ever talked about her anymore. It would be "the User", because that's what she was good at. I could probably also call her "Succubus" but she was able to sap the resources out of ANYTHING/ANYONE so that may not be as appropriate, because it was never sexual with her and I. It was, however, sexual with many a male "suitor". I guess she gave a great blowy and was otherwise phenomenal in the sack, so they say. Additionally, she was hilarious as shit, which is why I stuck around. Oh, and she was the social butterfly queen (for a while).

She at one point dated this guy that we can call ATL. ATL was best friends with the guy who this whole back story is about. After the User and ATL "broke up", and I got tired of being used, ATL and I would hang out. B and the other guy would come over and we would play drinking games and blah blah blah. This guy was kind of a lightweight, but when we would get tipsy we got sosososo flirty. And this was when I was super duper fat, so obviously there was chemistry beyond appearance.

I went away to college, ATL moved to...well ATL and I lost touch with the guy. I stayed in sporadic touch with ATL, so when he and I became friends on facebook, I asked about the guy. I friend-ed him and months later he actually responded to my inquiry into his well being.

A few weeks ago, he hit me up. We sent a few holiday messages, and decided it would be cool to meet up. So we are. We're meeting up tomorrow for dinner or drinks, or whatever the hell we're doing. I don't know. He's a personal trainer now. His body has always been ridiculous and he has great teeth and dimples. I haven't seen him in over 8 years though. He hasn't seen me since I lost the weight, only the pictures. It should be an interesting experience folks.

Maybe I'll name him after the weekend.

Happy belated holidays?

This post is a work in progress. Honestly, you can check back later and I will have put pictures in. (Late addition: I've decided to backload this whole entry with the pictures as opposed to scatter them throughout)

Work wall looking snazzier lately!

Nothing really exciting has been going on in my life lately. There were a few days there where I was getting a lot of action, but that quickly died down. I went to Sacramento to spend Christmas with the Mexican and his family. We didn't really do much.

Literally, this is what we did.

After making me wait three extra hours in the San Francisco airport, the Mexican and his sister showed up. I was a touch perturbed considering I had been in JFK for about 2 hours before my flight (JBike drove me, and it was a very quick ride), and the flight is 6 hours. Although, I did have two seats to myself, so I got to sit/lay down across the two seats at 8am in the morning, which was pleasant enough. Thank you vicodin for keeping the pain of sitting for that long to a minimum. Actually, I only took half of one, I was being classy.

Having lost 3 hours to the time change, I left my house at 5:45am, and finally completed my travel time at only 2pm. (On the way back we left the house at 10:30 and I got home at midnight).

We spent a few hours at Fisherman's Wharf eating Clam Chowder out of a Sourdough bread bowl, and having this delicious salad with Jicama, which I usually don't care for. Also, we had the most delicious Mojito. I would show you pictures, but day three of my trip makes that impossible...unfortunately.

We saw the sea lions and ate cotton candy. I didn't stop eating from Wednesday morning until...well I still haven't stopped eating.

Oh look at that it's 5pm. Time to go home. Perhaps I will finish this at home, although it's more likely to happen tomorrow at work because we're back in lull season!

Look at that...it's day 2 of trying to blog. 


Anyway, back to my trip to Sacramento. We drove home after spending some time at Fisherman's Wharf.

Sidenote: We saw this really young couple (neither of the people were over 20 by the looks) and they had a 2 year old downs baby. I salute them, and I feel bad for them because not only did they have babies young, they're in for a lifetime of care of that baby. I could never do it. Knock on wood.

So what the hell did we do...We ate food that the Mexican's mama made which was DELICIOUS - as was all of her food for the rest of the vacation. His mom really wasn't very chatty. I think if I spoke Spanish it would've been different, but she was really nice. His dad was a hoot. Yup, I said "a hoot". Just a funny guy. We got along. I got along with everyone!

I was still on east coast time, so it was hard to adjust and I went to sleep pretty darn early, and thus woke up...pretty darn early. I was up at 9am, but the Mexican didn't get up until noon...any of the days I was there (except the day I left because we had to be out of the house by 10:30). 

 Thursday we went to Davis, ate gourmet bagel sandwiches, and walked around. We went to the UC Davis campus where the Mexican and his friend both went. I almost bought sweatpants, but I wasn't feeling particularly spendy...and then we went to this sweets shop where I got this delicious treat.

Yup, chocolate cake and chocolate mousse in a chocolate ganache dome

Friday, we went to Old Sac, and found this new store called the Olive Mix, and sampled dozens of EVOO and balsamic vinegars. Bought myself 100 bucks worth of them. It was a delicious delicious day. Unfortunately, I didn't take pics at all of what I got just yet, but I've been using them and it's been fantastic! (I've made a million crostinis since I've been home because we are currently "stove-less"). We also went to all of these gag/novelty gift shops. I almost got B shot glasses, but I took pictures of the sayings instead. I, however, lost these photos in the media card debacle of Saturday morning.

Saturday the Mexican and I were sitting in my room and I couldn't get my facebook messenger icon to disappear on my phone, even though I couldn't find the unopened messages...so like anyone with a blackberry would've done, I popped the battery. Unfortunately, my media card was being accessed at the time and by pulling the battery while that was going on, I corrupted the card and lost everything. I tried everything to get it back, but eventually just reformatted and reloaded when I got home. Therefore, I lost whatever pictures I had, because I forgot to take my camera ANYWHERE.

Anyway, for the rest of the time I was there we pretty much only went to holiday shop for the Mexican's family and watched movies. A million goddamn movies. I had seen pretty much all of them before. So basically it was relaxing as shit...until my flight home.

Oh, and xmas was fine. We didn't really do anything special. I got an infinity scarf from the Mexican's mom that he tried to steal (with no success). I didn't really take pictures of ANYTHING. I did try in and out burger on the way to the airport though, so that was nice.

Christmas set up

I was seated next to this kid who must've had Tourette's and bad BO. Thankfully the plane was mostly empty and the woman next to me moved to her own row. Also, the kid was quiet enough during the flight that my headphones drowned him out. By kid, I must tell you that this "kid" was probably 17. He would burst out into song and move around a lot, and each time he leaned back and frantically moved around, his BO would waft over to me. Not the most pleasant thing ever, but survivable as it was only once in a while and I tried to sleep most of the time.

JBike picked me up from the airport. I was surprised he didn't stay over, but I guess he's on his gypsy cab grind. Can't fault him for that. I'd like my money back at SOME point.

How was everyone else's holiday?

I came back to work to a handful of gifts. This year I splurged more on myself than I ever have for the holidays before. I bought mini portable speakers, all of that stuff at the olive mix, a tshirt, and $70 worth of chocolate.

MOST AMAZING chocolate. You should try it.

Basic speaker I can hook up to my phone or ipod.

Awesome little speaker that I can just put my media card right into! FOR traveling!

This is what the tshirt looks like. BINGE eating!

So much chocolate, so little time.

These two truffles were AMAZING from one of the Drs. I work with on grants.

From one of my fellows. I might have to regift this though. I can't handle more chocolate.

From my supervisor. Love Dark Chocolate!

Other gifts from coworkers (basil infused EVOO not pictured)

From the Divisional Administrator. Super cute "ornament" and squishy!

Poinsettia from one of the co-chiefs

Much prettier closer up!

From both co-chiefs. $25 more than last year!

My old temp agency sends the weirdest gifts every year! Gave to my dad.

From my program director. It's full of all sorts of soaps and bath products. Do I need to bathe more?

I've also picked up a snazzy oragami hobby (again) thanks to learning how to make these little gems:

My mom is feeding into this hobby because she wants me to make small oragami beads that she can make earrings out of. DONE! I made a crab and lotus flower yesterday. I might start bringing some to work because it's a slow time of year.

Indifference is nothing different

I think I take a lot for granted. I mean, I know that I'm a lucky person. I have a pretty good job, a handful of good friends, everything else I could possibly need or honestly want, but I still have this blah feeling most of the time.

I'm going to California tomorrow. I know I should be excited and part of me is. I'm going to spend 5 days with the Mexican and his family. I haven't been to Cali since my cousin's Bat Mitzvah god knows how long ago. I'm pretty sure it was 2008/2009 though because I'm almost positive I flew in from Chicago. Yup, spring of 2009.

Anyway, I'm all packed, and I managed not to overpack because I was not going to pay $25 for my bag to be checked each way, and it's California. Worst case scenario, I buy a new outfit. There are worse things.

 

I'm a bit stressed about the presents situation though. My parents and I haven't celebrated a holiday since I was about 13. Well, a holiday other than Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is a special exception because we love food, and my mom's a great chef. Basically, we don't celebrate the gift giving holidays. Every once in a while we'll buy birthday gifts, but those are few and far between and take a few months to get. Last gift I got my mom was this glass bead making class. Last gift I got my dad was a bike. It took me 6 months to get the camera I asked for from my dad, but it was worth it. I'm still waiting on my mother's gift from this past year. Oh well.

So basically I'm faced with this whole gift giving situation in California. I've never met the Mexican's parents. I got his mom some Blue Mountain Coffee from Jamaica, and I think that I'm just going to give him money towards his dad's present. Also, I think I'll give his sister a gift card, but I don't know where to, yet. I didn't get him anything. Here's to hoping he didn't get me anything.

Playboy told me he got me a small present. I told him he didn't have to and asked him what he wanted, because I would feel guilty if I didn't get him anything and he got me something. He said boots or a phone. WHO THE FUCK DOES HE THINK I AM? We don't even have conversations. I don't even like him that much, and he's obviously a player. I told him I thought he was crazy and that he didn't need to give me anything. Our "friendship" has been not so consistent ever since.

I've seen most of my BCs this week actually. I saw JBike, Steel Pans and HWizard.

I've realized that I have very little emotion towards anyone these days. It's pretty sad.

I went to Merry Courtmas on Saturday to celebrate my old college roommate's birthday. I've missed it every year so I figured I'd would at least spend a little time there. Drove up to Westchester, spent an hour and then headed down to meet B in the Bronx. We went to HK. I had fun, it was expensive, but still, I need to dance. I mean, I really needed to dance. Very few pictures were taken.

I didn't go to a holiday party on Sunday because I got incredibly lazy. That's been the story of my life lately. I've been choosing my bed over a lot.

B and I went to see the Possibility Project's Foster Care play on Wednesday, and it was good. It's always kind of weird going back there because that's how B and I met 10 years ago. It's always good to see everyone though. I really need to call some people and make plans to see them in the new year. B and I went back to my house after the play and drank Sangria. I got pretty drunk. Playboy came over and yet again nothing happened. One of us has to get more aggressive or this whole situation isn't going to work. I felt like TRASH the next morning though, and some of that night. I'm so classy. B and I did however discuss what happened back in August and everything is finally on the table. I cried, a lot. Again, classy. Thanks wine.

Thursday there were a bunch of holiday parties at work and I ate until I was ready to explode. I've been doing that a lot lately. I have big plans to really get my eating under control in the new year, but I'm not kidding myself about the holiday season. I've already had 4 chocolates and a cookie today. I feel sick but keep on keepin' on.

I wish I could talk more about how blah I've been feeling lately, but I really don't feel connected with anyone these days. I mean there's Mo, and I talk to B sometimes, but I'm just very much...eh.

I need to figure out my New Years plans. Hopefully I start to feel differently while I'm in California.

Catch ya next week folks. Have a happy holiday.

My wings are getting tired

Social butterfly wings that is.


After Thursday, I wasn't planning on going out on Friday. I feel like weekends have become my rest days. It's sad, and I feel like a grandma, but I really enjoy sleep.

Anyway, this guy who I went out with once...let's call him Gym Teacher, invited me out Friday night. Sure, I might've mentioned I could possibly make Friday work, but I wasn't expecting him to. However, I agreed.

We went to this place called Tonic in Midtown East/Murray Hill...whatever. I was drinking on the train. Leftovers from Honey, so that was good. I got there and I wasn't really feeling anything (the Long Island had become watered down). He bought me drinks though, and I drank...a lot. Well, maybe not a lot. I did get a little irritated at this guy who was basically leaning on my back. The Gym Teacher (GT) thought it was pretty funny because I was getting a little huffy, so he pulled me away from the bar where we were standing to calm me down.

A few funny things happened. One, we watched this white girl and black guy dance and it was HILARIOUS. She had less rhythm than me. Honestly, I'm pretty good at "dubbing". Yeah, that's right, I can grind like...a mortar and pestle? Anyway, this girl was so off beat it was pretty hilarious. Secondly, the men's bathroom didn't have a lock on it, but it was just a single person bathroom, so while GT was peeing, two other guys walked into the bathroom. They were so quick! I didn't have time to stop them...so I just laughed.

Pretty much we danced until 4am, made out a lot and then he drove me home. I'm always impressed with my ability to give directions when drunk...because I was DEFINITELY drunk.

Saturday, I was supposed to go out for Heels' birthday. I actually got in the shower to get ready. B was going to come too, but she wasn't feeling well. Then, whilst showering, I discovered I had hives. Well, that's what my mom said they were. I've never had an allergic reaction to anything before...well not really, and I hadn't had anything new recently, so I had no idea what was going on. Also, it was completely isolated to my breasts (under my bra area- which could've explained it...if I had been wearing one at all that day) and a few little dots on my belly. Said hives, plus my train being a complete douchebag this weekend again, combined with having to wake up at 8:30am, kept me home.

Great sleep. Hivey boobs. What a Saturday.

Sunday I woke up early to go meet my cousin in the city. I haven't seen her since last Thanksgiving and I was excited to talk to her. Honestly, every time I hang out with my mom's side of the family, it makes me realize that maybe my family isn't a complete disaster (then I check facebook and read all about my dad's side and the reminder wavers a little). We had a great brunch and I dropped her off at the subway. Hopefully we'll keep in touch more. I think we're both at points in our lives where our relationship could be great!

Afterward, I went to go pick up the guy I had gone to Indian food and La Caverna with last weekend. Let's give him a name...Compas, because that's what he likes to listen to the best. I picked him up and we went to go to IHOP so he could get something to eat, because the Mexican and his boy were supposed to be coming 30 minutes later. I finally found parking, we walked over to IHOP and it was packed. Then I got a message from the Mexican and they arrived early. We went back to the car, scooped them up and headed up to Hopewell Junction, NY - to Fishkill Farms. We wanted to go physically apple picking, but it's late in the season, so instead we got apple cider donuts and hot apple cider at an orchard. We sat on the back porch, overlooking the pretty scenery and ate and drank our treats.

The Mexican with his hot apple cider

I shopped. I got pumpkins and apples and produce and honey vinegar and it was just glorious.

We went to Cracker Barrel afterward, which was pretty much the reason the Mexican wanted to go apple picking in the first place...because there are none of them in NYC. (By the way, both Compas and I are geniuses according to the peg game.)

Peg game - I'm a genius

The car rides were not bad. I mean, other than being an hour and change each way. We all chatted on the way up there and sang along to some music. The Mexican and his boy napped on the way back and Compas and I held hands and chatted on the way back. It was actually really sweet. He was great the whole day. He was just the right level of affectionate, hugging me sometimes and kissing the top of my head/cheek.

I came home and roasted my acorn squash, toasted the pepitas, and cooked collard greens that I bought at Fishkill and watched TV until I passed out.

Toasted pepitas!

I'm a really lucky girl.

Except of course for the fact that I haven't heard from Steel Pans in over a week. Money ruins everything.

And then he wanted to be little spoon...

That's right, HE wanted to be LITTLE spoon.

Hell to the fucking no! I will not be made to seem gargantuan and the man in this situation. You want me to wrap my arms around YOUR back. Who the fuck do you think you are?

Phew. All of that being said, let me recap my evening for you.

After manicures with the Mexican, we went downtown to this shitty bar named "Nowhere". That's right. We went NOWHERE. The bartender was a sweetie though, and it was a gay bar, so who was I to complain really? I was just there to kill time with the Mexican before his other friends got there and I could make my way to Honey.

Writings on the wall of the restroom at Nowhere Bar.

We got pretty schnocked within the first 30 minutes. It was glorious. I was starving. I couldn't even finish my last drink. I missed the bus by 10 seconds and ended up walking from 1st to 8th Avenue. For those of you who don't know, avenues in NYC are long. There is a drastic different between "blocks" and "avenues". 10 blocks is not a lot. 10 avenues makes my shin splints ache just thinking about it.

I was moving quickly though, because I was drunk...and even if I wasn't ACTUALLY moving quickly, it felt that way. I wanted a taco. Badly.

The taco truck took 20 minutes. I almost shit a brick and punched a Mexican. Not THE Mexican, A Mexican.

I met up with Feathers and Heels at Honey. I have pictures. I also forgot my camera at home, so they mean nothing to you right now. This crazy guy who semi stalks all of us sometimes was going to by me a drink, but D was refusing to serve him because he's a little nutty. I eventually walked away. The drink was not worth it.

The rest of the night was pretty standard, no weird run ins with Abdul at the bathroom...although he propositioned me again. I insulted his stamina though. He might not be so happy about that. Oh and I saw the boy that I desperately have a crush on, who is 20 years old and I gave at least three drinks to. He is looking even better than usual these days. Goddamn cradle robbing. 

I pretty much RAN to the train station at a quarter to 12 because at 12am my train was going to start running in sections, and we all know how much that makes me hate my life.

Guess which classy lady made it to the last Q train going all the way to Coney Island? YUP! I made it, guys. It was glorious. I was on cloud nine. It was fluffy.

When I got to my block I met up with this guy who I've had terrible sex with before. Yes, terrible in that it was boring. I told him this. Like every man in history, he needed to protect his pride/ego/penis and wanted to prove to me that he could rock my world. So we've been talking again lately, because I've been drinking a lot, and I like my world to rock - I don't get motion sickness.

He wanted to cuddle last night though. That was fine with me. I would've liked him to stick it in, probably...but whatever cuddling is fine.

Here's what actually went down though...wait for it...wait for it...

NOTHING.

We talked about sports for a little while, whilst watching ESPN. This is typical. Then it came time to cuddle.

He didn't want to cuddle me, he wanted to be cuddled by me.

I was flabberghasted. I made sure I heard him right.

"You want me to be the big spoon?"

"Yes."

"So what you're saying is YOU want to be LITTLE spoon?"

"Yes."

"Funny."

He took off his shirt and pants and we went to bed.

I tried. I tried to cuddle him once, but my heart got all racey because it was such an awkward situation and I was dehydrated and any kind of movement was requiring a lot of energy. Ten seconds in, I bailed. I scooted away. Caught my breath and drank some water.

Thank god he's a silent sleeper, or I would've killed myself/him.

I don't know why he didn't leave. We didn't make eye contact in the morning. I don't know if he was kidding when he said "thanks for the cuddle, I needed that." I think he might just be crazy.

I can't handle it.

The nerve.

I WILL NEVER BE BIG SPOON. GET THAT STRAIGHT. (He might not be...that's the problem.)

Addendum - Never say never. Basically if we've been in a relationship for a while and you need a snuggle, I get it. It won't be for very long, but it could happen. However, if we are hardly even booty calls, do not under any circumstances expect anything but a fork...and I will not be the fork either.

Pledging my October to alcohol, get on board.

Have you ever had that feeling that everything is moving way faster than you are? Or that you just want to stop at every street corner and empty your already empty guts? Yeah...welcome to my morning.

I'm pretty sure I was moving in slow motion this morning, and it was not pleasant. All I want is a toasted bagel to fill up my belly. It's not going to happen though. I can't get myself together enough to move.

The Stumble Inn was pretty entertaining last night to say the least. I decided about midday that I was going to get smashed and I did.

We stopped for vodka on the way to the bar. Always smart. The bartender at the Allie Way is adorable, but so stupid. Like really dumb. Oh well, nice eye candy.

We got to the stumble around 6:45 I would say? Odd that we were at the Allie Way so long, considering we each only had two vodka on the rocks'. Anyway, got to there and commenced drinking hard cider. Very, very classy. Sarah and the Mexican ate a stuffed burger and nachos. I decided against it, for optimal "get drunk" speed.

To make an already long story shorter than it could be, the following are things I did last night:

• Felt up a fire fighter. He was such an asshole, and he was wasted. They called him "Cockasaurus Rex", I had to feel for myself. So I did, a lot.
• Introduced Tiffany to another fireman who is also a nurse that I gave my card to because I told him I could get him a job. LOL. RIGHT. He was adorable though.
• Was bought a pint by an Irishman. He was a ginger.
• Played beer pong and did quite well, but went to go pee and my partner lost the game for us.
• Lots of fist bumps and high fives.
• Exchanged numbers with a second grade teacher that wanted to touch my boobs.
• Scratched my throat with my finger, demonstrating lack of gag reflex.
• Got shithoused.
• Dirty texted - not quite sexting.

I also ended up pissed at the MTA yet again, because the train was running in sections and I almost didn't catch my connection at 1:05am.

Oh, I went on a blind date on Saturday. We went to Indian food. He bought a bottle of wine. We went to a karaoke bar and didn't sing. Went to a regular bar and definitely sang, danced and got schwasted. Went to a "club" and definitely sang, danced and got more schwasted. Lots of making out ensued, LOTS.

I think we're going apple picking on Sunday.

Life is good, even if my belly feels like GAR-BAHGE right now (you like my phonetic french accent? I thought you would.)

Honey tonight.

Did I tell you about Honey last week? I hope I did. Highlight...30 seconds of sex in the bathroom with little Abdul. Damn, I just looked. I did not tell you about Honey last week. I looked hot as shit in my new dress thing. There was drinking. I don't remember if there was much dancing. Damn it seems so long ago. Oh well, more tonight.

It's cool, my diet is shot. I'm not planning on going to the gym again until November. Also, I plan on being drunk for the better part of the rest of the month. My stomach turned a little when I wrote that. GET ON BOARD LIVER, OR I'M LEAVING YOUR ASS BEHIND.

Oh yeah, and B and I got drunk at Blockheads on Monday. Sorry for partying.

Chicago comes to New York!

I'm a negative blogger. I prefer rant posts to anything else. Either ranting or drunken recall, and since I've neither been upset nor drunk lately, I have little to no blog material.

I have decided it might be time to recap Mo's trip to NYC. This is just a boring recall, I apologize in advance for the lack of snarky commentary. I'm just kind of blah. I really want bread.

As you may already know, Mo arrived on Thursday 9/22 in the evening...this means that we were at Honey.

Since she was getting in late, the Mexican and I decided to go get Korean fried chicken. We wanted to decide who had the better chicken between two places, so we went to both. We went to Bon Chon and then Kyo Chon in Koreatown. I was feeling OK, but again I was getting a little burpy which is never ok before drinking.

We parted ways and I headed to Honey. It was actually a quite beautiful night, maybe a little hot and muggy, but nice regardless.  I reserved the outside so I was sitting there with Feathers and Heels, drinking. Kirk was harassing Heels and we were all pretty much trying to ignore his cocky ass. I had to get a carafe of water because I started feeling terrible and getting hot sweats from the fried food and mugginess (I have no gall bladder, so fried usually doesn't go so well with me). My stomach started to settle, thank goodness.

Before we knew it, Mo had arrived! She got out of the cab saying that she thought she was going to die in there because he was speeding down the highway. I didn't give her much time to talk before saddling her up with some pre-ordered drinks.

Shortly there after, B and her other friend arrived...we'll call him Cousteau, because it makes sense to me. He's not unattractive and he's got a decent personality. He's shorter than I am and the only guy I've ever had sex with who was. ANYWAY. The drinking had commenced.

Mo and B, reunited and it feels so good!

Cousteau and B

Anyway, the evening went on. I don't remember going inside to dance at all, but B and Mo did. I'm pretty sure Feathers did too at some point. We all got trashed. Like TRASHED. Feathers didn't remember leaving and I guess she vommed in the cab and ruined her shoes. Yet again, I managed to get everyone HAMMERED. I don't remember saying goodbye to anyone, but Mo told me a did. Cousteau drove us two blocks to the train station where Mo and I got on the train and I promptly told her what stop we were getting off at, and passed out. (I'm a really great host, I promise). I woke up right before our stop and we got off and got life saving sandwiches. I lost half of mine though. To this day, I still don't know where it is. I don't think I ate it.

Friday it rained. I had taken the day off. We did nothing. We watched TV and I cleared my DVR in anticipation of all of the fall premieres/shows. We eventually got hungry in the evening and decided it was time to get ready. We were going to Taj for Chris' birthday and wanted to get dinner first.

We got ready, packed up the bottle of Cosmo and Pomm-Appletini from Honey the night before and made our way to Union Square.

We decided to eat at Republic, and it was delicious. Then we walked in the rain up towards Taj. We were going to meet up with Feathers, but we could NOT figure out a plan, so we ended up at Taj really early. I started drinking.

We were standing on the corner and Mo said we couldn't do that because we looked like prostitutes. Then we moved under some scaffolding not too far from the corner and a crazy/homeless man basically called us lesbian hookers. I don't know WHY Mo humored him and responded to what he was saying. I tried to ignore him, but then almost got into an argument with him because I mumbled "Why can't you just disappear?" to which he responded "How am I supposed to disappear on a public street?" I retorted with something like "You didn't need to stop here. Goodbye." I ignored everything else he said. He was the one who said he would let us get back to each other and "make our money". Absurd.

So we went to Taj, got there around the same time as Chris. We got in just before midnight and they have two for one drinks. So I got two cran vodkas and two long islands. They lasted me the whole night. I nursed them and held down the bar. Dancing happened. Monica was cuffed pretty fast by this adorable boy named Dorian, and just like every time I go to Taj, the deaf people find me. That's right, deaf. I don't have a problem with the hearing impaired, but the limited sign language I know does not allow us to converse, and I really want to be able to jam to the words of a song as well as the beat. I got away that time. We left around 3:30am.

Chris dancing on her bday!

Tired Mo, need to sit.

Saturday Mo wanted to be a tourist. So we tried to make it into the new 9/11 Memorial. Unfortunately, there were no tickets left so we just ended up walking around Lower Manhattan for a little while. We got delicious Pizza and went up to Times Square. We rode the ferris wheel in Toys R Us. We were those people. Those ADULTS I should say. It was pretty glorious. Afterward, we made plans to meet up with the Mexican and one of his roommates down in Chinatown.

Freedom Tower in progress

My little pony car at Toys R Us

We were early to Chinatown and so we got some bubble tea and just hung out before going to this Vietnamese place for dinner. It was pretty damn delicious.

We had plans to meet up with VWR and Ebony Banker (EB) at this bar Legends. So we went up to Herald Square and into the bar to look for her. It was PACKED. The LSU game was on and it was an LSU fan bar. So hot. I went outside to try and get in contact with VWR and had a frustrating time figuring out what to do. She was drunk and kept asking the same questions. They finally agreed to come meet us for a little while so we went back to Legends where I promptly downed two or three cran vodkas in the hell hole they call their upstairs. It was nice to see VWR and EB though. They're a really cute couple. We stayed for about 45 mins and then walked over to HK Lounge to meet Chris for bday round two, and T for one of her friend's bdays (her friend who I've met a million times before). We didn't stay there long because our feet were KILLING us.

Mo and I left around 2, 2:30am. It took us two hours to get home, thanks to the awesomeness of the MT-FUCKING-A. Our feet were so unhappy.

Sunday Mo wanted to be touristy again. We RUSHED to get to the Statue of Liberty boat. It was actually a really nice day. We saw the Statue and Ellis Island and then went up to Curry Hill for some DELICIOUS Indian lunch. We went back up to Times Square to get some souvenirs and decided not to go see a broadway show. Instead we went back to Brooklyn and I took Mo to see the Brooklyn Heights Promenade which is the best view of Manhattan. Unfortunately, the pictures suck because it was night, but it was beautiful. We went to the movies and then home. We had to be up at 4am to go to the airport.

Liberty Island

On the boat to the islands

Overall, I had a great time. My toes are bruised a million ways and I didn't do ANYTHING (other than Honey) the next week/weekend because I needed to recover, but it was a good time.

In other news:

• As I mentioned, I booked my trips to Chicago and Jamaica and I cannot WAIT
• I bought a ton of clothing that I may or may not need
• I need to get a million pairs of pants hemmed
• I've been pretty good about going to the gym lately - my legs hurt a lot right now
• I have to shop for Jamaica and a Halloween Costume
• I need a pair of nice waterproof leather boots
• I have a cold and I'm tired of this goddamn sore throat
• I'm going to the Jets game on 11/11 and could not be more excited about that
• I lent Steel Pans $400 so that he could get his license reinstated and go back to work (baby mama drama)
• I really want a piece of cake
• These pants pockets aren't big enough for my phone
• I don't want to do anything at work

Day 9: How do I love thee, let me count the ways

 

 Loves eh? This should be interesting. There are lots of things that I love. A few are stupid, some are profound, and most will not make it on this list. Let's see if I can pull together NINE of these suckers. Am I in a good enough mood for that?

What I love...

1. My parents

I know that losing them was one of my fears, so maybe this is a little repetitive, but they really are the best. I don't know where I'd be without either of them. They're a balance of crazy and perfect. I am who I am because of them, most definitely. Obviously I could not imagine if they had never had kids, but even if I wasn't their kid, I know there would be something missing in the world. Somehow when they had me, they got a manual and have been doing the best any kid could ask for.

My mom and I were a lot fatter then...this is the only picture I could find at work (thanks facebook). Oh my mom doesn't have blond hair anymore either.

2. Good friends

Friends are what get me through each and every day. I have a number of gems in my life (Mo, Feather, the Mexican, B...etc) and I'm just lucky. I sometimes wish I had a bigger group of friends, and maybe I will one day, but for now I'm just content to have a few great friendships.

3. Traveling

Who doesn't love to get away? I love new cultures, new people, new everything. I just like the experience of starting over and being somewhere different. There's nothing more thrilling than showing up somewhere you've never been before and have been anticipating going for a long time. Also, there's really nothing better than traveling with a big group of wonderful friends that make every moment entertaining.

4. Food (cucumbers are a big component of said food)

I'm a fat girl at heart and in practice. You've probably all seen my food updates. I have an unhealthy obsession with food, but I just can't seem to get enough. My taste buds are really greedy, what can I say?

5. Technology (Internet, Cell phone, TV...etc)

Obviously I love the internet for being an amazing resource for everything. I couldn't live without my cell phone (for a very long time at least). I need to be connected. TV is probably my favorite solitary pastime - I watch a lot of it and love getting lost in the stories.

6. Laughter

This is of course unless it's a heinous laugh. There are some really bad laughs out there. Otherwise, laughter is lifeblood. It's great for your heart and your life and just makes everything better. Love it. Need it. CRAVE it.

7. Roller coasters

I guess I could've just said thrills. I love things that get my heart beating and make me experience things I don't normally feel - like free fall. I love the feeling of free fall. I love excitement. I love fun!

8. Good smells

Bad odors are the worst, good smells bring back great memories. I love the smell of cleanliness, freshness. Not only is it hygenic, but it's a turn on to the umpteenth degree. I love great smelling colognes and certain types of foods. I have a really keen sense of smell, so it's important to me to expose myself to titillating and tantalizing odors.

9. Primary Colors

I guess I just like colors in general. Deep saturated colors. I'm not really a big fan of pastels, but primary colors are beautiful and I just love to see them. Without primary colors, you couldn't have any of the rest! The world is much better when it's not in black and white (or so I think)